Not To Me
by lovemondotrasho
Summary: Serenity was cooking dinner for her husband and son one night when she got a call that shattered her whole world. ONESHOT.


**I've been tossing this idea around for a while now, but I've been really hesitant to put it up because of the general topic. I like the way this came out, so hope you guys like it!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh.**

* * *

Serenity watched over the various sauces on the stove top. They were bubbling away furiously. She lowered the heat on two of them and began to chop onions. She began to hum to herself. Not a particular song. Just a melody that'd been stuck in her head for a while. She turned around and glanced at the clock. Her brow furrowed.

_8:45. And Seto's not home yet. What could be keeping him?_

She brushed it off and returned to her onions. She was preparing dinner for the two men in her life. Well, one man and one boy. She smiled at the thought of her five year old son, Seth. He looked just like his father. Brown hair and the same smile. It was just his eyes. His hazel eyes.

She slid the onions into one of the sauces and pulled a box of pasta out. She snapped it in half and dropped it into the boiling water. Stirring occasionally, her mind wandered away from dinner.

_Nearly two hours late. I hope he's OK. God, he's such a workaholic sometimes…At least dinner will be ready by the time he comes home. _

She turned off the heat on the sauces and turned up the heat on the pasta. In a matter of minutes, the pot was overflowing with noodles. She strained the pasta and set it aside. She busied herself with finishing dinner.

_Three plates, three forks, three glasses…_The table was set and the pasta was steaming on the table. She put the sauce next to the pasta and lay a hand on her hip. _If Seto comes home and complains about dinner being cold…I swear. _

She was about to call Seth for dinner when the phone rang. She sighed before striding over to it. "Seto Kaiba…I wonder about you sometimes," she muttered. "Hello?"

"Is Mrs. Kaiba there?"

It was an unfamiliar voice. Her eyebrows knit at the voice. "Speaking. Is something wrong?"

There was a brief pause. It seemed the caller didn't quite know how to phrase what he wanted to say. "Mrs. Kaiba, there's no easy way to say this…"

Her heart was beating, though she didn't know why. "What's wrong?" she repeated.

"Mrs. Kaiba, there's been a car crash, not too far from the Kaiba Mansion. Your husband, Seto Kaiba…"

Her heart stopped. She didn't want to believe it. "No," she whispered.

"I'm so sorry, Mrs. Kaiba. I send my condolences."

She gripped the phone. Her knuckles were turning white. "I don't understand. What kind of twisted joke is this? Who the hell are you?" she demanded.

The caller sighed. "I'm a business partner of Mr. Kaiba's. Jay Williams?" he asked hopefully.

She'd heard of Jay from Seto. Apparently, Jay was very reliable when it came to business matters. "Alright, Jay, what kind of sick joke is this?"

"I wish I was joking, Mrs. Kaiba," he said grimly.

Then the truth hit her. Hard. "Seto's…dead?" she whispered. _No. This couldn't be happening. Seto was just running late. He was going to come home dammit. He couldn't just leave Seth._

"Mrs. Kaiba? Mrs. Kaiba?"

Nothing after that reached her. She sank to her knees clutching the cordless. Hot tears began rolling down her cheeks. _How am I supposed to go on? How am I supposed to tell Seth? _Her head began to spin. _How could he just leave us like that? Without a warning, he just left. _She dropped the phone and buried her face in her hands, bringing her knees up to her chest.

_Thump. Thump. Thump. _

"Mommy, is dinner ready yet?"

Her heart broke at the child's words. He didn't know his father would never come home. She reached out, grabbed Seth and cried into his shoulder.

* * *

It'd been almost a week since that day. The day she'd gotten the call that shattered her entire world. Joey, Mai and their twins, Jesse and Christina, had flown into Domino from America as soon as they heard the news. They couldn't believe it either. Thinking of Seto Kaiba, dead. It just didn't sound right. Seth still didn't understand what was happening. He would ask his uncle Joey and aunt Mai where his father was and why he hadn't come home for so long before rushing off to go play with his cousins.

Mai helped her zip up her black dress. She silently made her way to the car as Joey drove them to the church. Stepping in, she remembered the last time she'd walked in her for something so important.

She softly smiled at the stained glass window. It was the first thing that she looked at when she walked in. Then her eyes caught sight of her brunette fiance. He gave her his trademark smirk before turning to his future brother-in-law.

Six years ago, the happiest day of her life. The day she married Seto Kaiba. She felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up at Joey. He gave her a reassuring smile and hugged her. Mai watched them sadly. She had been keeping an eye on all of the kids, but she couldn't help but see how Serenity was holding up. She wiped her eyes and looked down when she felt a tug on her skirt.

Seth was looking up at her with huge amber eyes. "Is Daddy in that box?" he asked pointing to the coffin in the front.

Mai knelt down and cried for Seth. Jesse and Christina shyly stood behind Mai. They were only seven years old. They knew that their Uncle Kaiba had died, but they didn't know how to react. They decided to pat their mother's back and whisper things such as, "It's OK, Mommy." They did their best to make both their mother and only cousin feel better.

Serenity caught sight of this and squeezed her eyes shut. Her hand flew up to her mouth. Seto would never be there for Seth. He'd never be able to take the training wheels of his bike. Never be able to be there for his first broken bone. Never get to help out with his first girlfriend. Never give him his first car keys. The thought of her only child growing up without a father became surreal to her. She raced over to her sister-in-law, her son, her niece and nephew and embraced them all.

Joey tried to keep things together for his family, but he too eventually lost it when he thought of his sister and nephew having to endure life without the man they both loved.

Thoughts kept bouncing around in Serenity's mind. She couldn't focus on more than one thing. The thought of Seto leaving her forever. The thought of him surprising Seth, Jesse and Christina at Christmastime. The thought of him not being able to taunt Joey. She felt lost without him. He was her other half and now that other half would never be found.

She heard a deep, reassuring voice. Then a soft, musical one. She looked up and saw Yami and his wife, Ishizu, making their way toward them. The mysterious glint had disappeared from his eyes. They were replaced with sadness and a look of uncertainty.

Ishizu let go of his forearm to embrace Serenity. She didn't trust herself to speak. Not only was she mourning the loss of a friend, she had never been in Serenity's position. She didn't know what to say to her. What can you say to someone who'd just lost her other half? Ishizu was not one to sugar coat. She didn't like telling people that things would be OK if they wouldn't. She didn't like giving false hopes.

Serenity cried on her shoulder, breaking the young egyptian's heart. Joey hastily rubbed his puffy eyes and turned away, trying to talk to Yami. Mai scooped Seth in her arms and bounced him on her hip.

Serenity heard footsteps from behind her. She tore herself out of Ishizu's arms and found herself face-to-face with her brother-in-law, Mokuba, sister-in-law, Rebecca, and nephew, Ritsu. Ritsu was holding on to his mother and father's hand tightly as he toddled down the aisle. Her heart broke when she noticed the look on Mokuba's face. He looked like he didn't know what to do. Everyone knew that he looked up to Seto and now that he was gone…One could only imagine what was going through the younger Kaiba's mind.

She made her way toward him and hugged him, trying to hold her tears in. He let go of Ritsu's hand and returned the hug, but wasn't able to keep his tears in. She pulled away and brushed at the wetness in her eyes. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small rectangle and handed it to him. Brushing his eyes, he peered at the rectangle. It was a Duel Monsters card. The Blue Eyes White Dragon. Mokuba pocketed it and reached for Rebecca and Ritsu's hand again. Serenity softly smiled at her four year old nephew. She watched as they took their seats.

Suddenly, everyone around her began taking their seats. Serenity took Seth from Mai and proceeded toward the front, where her husband lay. Every step there, she was getting closer to the coffin, but she felt like it was another step away from him. Suddenly, she stopped completely. She didn't want to go on. _Why couldn't something take her with him? Why couldn't she just escape life and join Seto on wherever he was going?_

The answer was in her arms. She looked down at her son's big hazel eyes. He looked up at her. The playfulness had disappeared from his eyes. Now he looked serious and sullen. "Mommy, can I walk now?"

She slowly set him down and he walked over to his grieving aunt and uncle and cousins. Joey sat him down next to Jesse and Christina. He caught his sister's eye and patted the seat next to him. She closed her eyes and dragged herself over to him.

The preacher stood in the front and began speaking. None of it made sense to Serenity. None of it mattered to her anyway. Seto was gone and he wasn't coming back. What use was there talking about how he was a good man and how he's in a better place? She looked down at the wedding ring on her finger. It seemed like just yesterday he slipped it on.

_"I promise I'll always be with you," _he said that day.

She angrily gripped her knees. _You broke that promise, Seto. Why did you leave me? I was counting on forever with you. _A few angry tears escaped her closed eyes. Her blood was pounding in her ears. _Our future is gone. _She opened her eyes and saw the casket. It had a carving of the Blue Eyes. She smiled a little. _His signature card. The one he'd always use one way or another. _

Everyone rose and prayed together. For Seto. For Serenity. And for Seth. After the prayers, Serenity took Seth's hand and walked up to the preacher.

"I'm so sorry for your loss, Mrs. Kaiba," he whispered. "Would you like to see him?"

She froze. _Would I be able to handle seeing him? Would I completely lose it in front of Seth? _Before she was aware, she was nodding slowly. Her hands were shaking as she lifted the top of the casket. She closed her eyes, not being able to take the sight of her husband's scarred face. His eyes were closed as if he was sleeping, but his scars…They shook Serenity. Seth tried to stand on his tiptoes to see his father, but she kept him away. She didn't want him to see his father like this. She didn't want the image of his lifeless father to be what he remembered of him.

She pushed the lid down and ran back into Joey's arms. She wanted to cry and scream, but she couldn't. She couldn't make a single sound or cry another tear. She'd been crying for days. When Seto was alive, she never cried.

_"Why are you crying?" _he would ask gruffly. _"I hate seeing you cry. It makes me feel like I've done something wrong." _

She always made an effort to keep smiling. _Why was it any different now? What would he think of her now? Would he think that she was being a child? Or would he feel like he did something wrong like he always did?_

Joey led her out of the church for a bit of fresh air. The sharp December wind hit her in an instant. She opened her eyes and watched little flurries cascade down and settle into the grass. December was his favourite month of the year. It was her favourite month of the year too. And it was for the same reason. For Christmas.

She looked up at the sky, wondering if Seto was looking down on her from the heavens. _ I thought we'd have forever, Seto. But then you had to leave me. You left me all alone with Seth. _

Mai was walking out of the church as well, but she was holding Seth's hand. She handed him to Joey and lay a comforting arm on Serenity's shoulder. She gave her a small smile and looked up at the sky with her. "He's watching you, Ren. He's watching you and Seth," she said quietly.

"She's…right," choked a soft voice. Serenity turned around. Mokuba, Rebecca and Ritsu were behind her, standing with Mai, Joey, Jesse and Christina. Mokuba stood next to Serenity. He plunged his hands into his pocket and looked up at the sky. "He's looking down on us. All of us." He looked at his in-laws and his own family. "All of us," he repeated.

Serenity fixed her gaze at the sky again. She found herself thinking of how Seto had left her all alone with Seth. "Not to me," she whispered. "This can't be happening to me."

* * *

نهاية


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